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Friday, January 13, 2012

Ten Things I Learned While Unemployed

I have spent the last two months, give or take, as one of America’s Unemployed. Don’t feel badly for me, I have a new job, starting next week, and it’s the longest time that I’ve been unemployed since my early 20’s. Not so bad. In addition, I didn't really mind losing my last job and I'm excited about starting the new one.

Because I believe that everything happens for a reason, and that every experience in your life is a lesson, I have been thinking about all the things I have learned while looking for a new job. In no particular order, here are my own personal lessons:

1. I LOVE wearing sweatpants. A lot. I have spent several weeks *not* having to wear dress clothes, or even jeans and shoes, on a daily basis. I have rarely “fixed up” my hair, put on a suit or dress pants, heels, or hose during this time. It has been fabulous!

2. Spending more time in the gym was a good idea, and nothing more.

3. I can make a dollar stretch a lot further when I have fewer of them to spend.

4. It was a good idea to write down every job I’ve applied for, the date, and the passwords to all of their websites for unemployment benefits purposes. I kept a journal of them, and it’s proven to be a wise move.

5. It’s a fallacy that you can’t make up for lost sleep.

6. How to make real, delicious, and not-so-easy shortbread cookies from scratch.

7. It is wonderful to have the whole holiday season off work. I did not have to work any of Thanksgiving weekend, Christmas weekend, or New Year’s weekend. This is the first year that has happened since my senior year of high school.

8. Christmas shopping on a strict budget is a challenge, but possible. And spoiling my nieces and nephews with extravagant gifts is not necessary. They love me when I buy inexpensive toys at Wal-Mart just as much.

9. Potential employers are not very kind to job-seekers. “We’ll call you by the weekend” is a lie, and they don’t care if you had your good suit dry-cleaned, woke up at 5 a.m., spent an hour in the bathroom fixing hair and face, and researched and rehearsed interview questions and then drove to another state in another time zone for the interview. Not only do you not get the job, you don’t get to find out why.

10. Last but not least, I was reminded once again that I have great friends and the best family in the world. They knew the right job was coming and believed that I was the right person for it, and if other people didn't see my value, they were just plain blind. Thanks!

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Mob Wives

There's a relatively new reality series on VH1 called Mob Wives. I'm not sure if it's a realistic portrayal of actual mob wives, but if it is? Then these are some really terrible human beings, and Staten Island isn't a place that I ever want to visit.

There are four of them. Their names aren't important, but their mob connections are real. Two of them are estranged from their incarcerated and mob-connected husbands, the other two are daughters of infamous mobsters who are also incarcerated. The four of them alternate between being the best of friends and the worst of enemies, sometimes in the same episode. They fight a lot, physically fight. One of them goes to a gym and boxes with a trainer regularly so that she can be better at fighting than the people she is itching to fight.

They also use an extreme amount of profanity. It's barely bleeped out, just bleeped enough so that you know what the words are, you just don't actually hear the whole word. I wonder why the censors bother, really.

The women are all mothers, from a teenager to small children. They aren't really with their kids all that much, one daughter lives out of state...way out of state, in Arizona. The women don't seem to have jobs, but they all live in nice houses and don't have any issues with money. They have plastic surgery and sit around the pool, go to the gym, out to nightclubs and parties. So either VH1 is paying them very well or they're living off mob money.

In short, these women and their friends make the Kardashian sisters look like a bunch of Peace Corps volunteers. They're vapid and selfish and shallow and despicable. They talk about "the lifestyle" as if they're the poor victims instead of the people who their fathers and husbands and boyfriends have victimized.

And I can't stop watching them. Sunday nights on VH1, 7pm, CST.

Ear Candy....
The theme song is also kind of awesome:
(If you click the link to the song, don't worry. Miley Cyrus is only in the video as an actress, she doesn't sing the song. I would never make people listen to Hannah Montana.)